zamaron:

it’s really important that you do some like self reflection and improvement after a relationship. like i get why people might get out of one relationship and role into another because they are afraid of being alone or w/e. but it’s kinda like you need time to deal with whatever you went through and make sure that even if the breakup wasn’t your fault at all (the person cheated on you or was abusive) that you still take time to pull your shit together and improve as a person. that could mean anything from learning better conflict resolution methods to learning how to draw feet correctly. just anything that lets you focus on YOU so when you go into your next relationship you have a sense of self and are more grounded. it also helps because you are saying “i don’t need this other person to improve i can do this myself”. idk there’s gonna be (usually) some degree emotional whiplash and it’s important that you give yourself ample time to deal with it especially if you are one of those people who repress shit and have it come it like 6 months later while eating dinner at applebee’s or something